By Sable Yong, Allure
In what appears to be a complete waste of scientific method-flexing, one study deduced that 63% of men believe that women wear makeup to "trick" them into thinking that they are more attractive.
I will pause for a collective eye-roll. All together now. Good? Great, moving on.
First of all (yeah, I said "first of all" so SETTLE IN), makeup-shaming
— and this is exactly that — is such a twisted vortex of double
standard bullshit. Women either wear too much makeup, which is
admonished as garish, trying too hard or "sad," or women who don't wear
makeup are harangued about daring to be ugly in public, not trying
enough, and in general offending the world with their unembellished
visage. And of course, the most belligerently vocal don't even bother to
offer alternative options for how women should wear their faces so as
not to inspire such ire (because that would almost be logical — not).
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but then there's the whole gendered expectation of how women are
supposed to appear, with the aid of cosmetics or not. Mind you, this
same study (which surveyed about 1120 people)
noted that only 37% of men (and 34% of women) believe that men mainly
use beards to hide facial imperfections like acne or a weak chin. As
someone who has witnessed the shorn male face as well as
scruffy-to-fully-bearded one, anyone can agree that the difference is
STAGGERING — like a completely different face with or without facial
hair. Meanwhile, 63% of these jabronis are popping off about my contour?
OKAY.
Y'all are probably the same dudes who feel entitled to
women's bodies anyway and already believe that women exist to just be
pretty and ornamental for you, so honestly, this perceived deceit is
just confusing. If you're going to be a sexist bigot, at least be
consistent, you know?
You know what — forget percentages and
statistics. Any makeup-wearing or beauty-interested woman has most
likely at one point felt the direct or indirect judgments of people who,
for whatever reason, have strong mouthy opinions on how their faces,
hair, and body should appear and how they should feel about all
that.
And you wonder why we take so damn long to get ready! We have to factor
in the time it takes to mentally shoo away the maddening chatter from
societal and patriarchal pressure about how our faces should appear so
that we can decide on a look that helps us feel the most like ourselves.
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Luckily,
we're in a progressive age of technology where those of us who do love
makeup and who may happen to be insecure or have questions about it can
convene to celebrate self-expression and artistry — which, when you
think of it, is really what makeup is for: it's a tool for
self-expression because everyone's appearance should be self-determined
(that goes for you too, bearded weak-chinned bros).
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We are painting our faces, dressing ourselves, and doing our hair to go about our lives however we feel that we need or want to on any given day, whether than involves fitting into a specific aesthetic or setting ourselves apart from the pack.
We are tailoring our appearance to be as beguiling or as aggressive as
we feel, and that shit is important because while you're all
busy telling us to smile on the street, maybe you should take a minute
to register my heavy liner and vamp lips before you open your mouth, and
just assume that I do not intend to trifle with you today.
This may come off as mildly threatening and that's OK, dudes. Consider
it a signal to start worrying about other shit than what women put on
their faces because it honestly has nothing to do with you.
Also, maybe re-think your facial hair, bros, before you come for my goddamn eyebrows.
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